Wednesday, December 26, 2007

THE DAY AFTER

First up, Happy Chrismschanukwanzikah!
Rhiannon A. from San Diego passed along these greetings--which I just can't resist sharing (she works in a law firm, BTW):
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Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2008, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere Also, this wish is made without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the recipient of said wish. By accepting these greetings, you are accepting the aforementioned terms as stated. This greeting is not subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself/himself/others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.
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Here's a video from one of my favorite comedians.
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This is late, but it says worlds about the mentality of some officials.
U.S. Customs agents have barred a lauded Canadian seller of Christmas trees from setting up shop in New York this year.
For the last nine years, Daniel Lemay, 39, a graphic designer from Montreal, has brought his trees south to sell in front of St. Mark's Church in-the-Bowery, The New York Times reported. Each year, Lemay donated 10 percent of his Christmas sales, about $3,000, to the church. He lived in an elaborate, birch-sapling shack he designed and transported from Canada for the season.
But this year, Lemay was stopped at the border in Beecher Falls, Vt., where he said border agents told him only U.S. residents could bring in trees to sell, the Times reported.
Lemay quickly sold his trees to another Canadian grower, Roger Boust, a retired tree farmer from the Catskills, to sell them in New York, the Times said.
Nonetheless, residents in the Bowery are saddened and feel as if the Grinch "stole our Christmas tree man," said the Rev. Frank Morales, associate pastor of St. Mark's.
There isn't anything I can do other than shake my head.
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"Always leave 'em laughing" department:
Little Johnny was eating breakfast one morning and started thinking about things.
"Mommy, why does daddy have so few hairs on his head?" he asked his mother.
"He thinks a lot," replied his mother, pleased with herself for coming up with a good answer to her husband's baldness.
Johnny thought for a second and asked,"So why do you have so much hair?"
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Don't forget to click the header.
Have good day or two.

Monday, December 24, 2007

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL

You'll have to click on the picture to read the explanation. (I'm still trying to learn how to use my photo editing thingee.)

In any case, this cat understands the Spirit of Giving pretty darn well.

I have a couple of other gifts also:

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http://www.funlaugh.com/Christmasmidis.html

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http://www.links2love.com/christmas_songs_grandmarunover.htm

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In Florida, an atheist became incensed over the preparation of Easter and Passover holidays. He decided to contact his lawyer about the discrimination inflicted on atheists by the constant celebrations afforded to Christians and Jews with all their holidays while atheists had no holiday to celebrate.

The case was brought before a wise judge. After listening to the long passionate presentation by the lawyer, the Judge banged his gavel and declared "Case dismissed!

"The lawyer immediately stood and objected to the ruling and said, "Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and many other observances. Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah...yet my client and all other atheists have no such holiday!"

The judge leaned forward in his chair and simply said, "Obviously your client is too confused to even know about, much less celebrate his own atheists' holiday!"

The lawyer pompously said, "Your Honor, we are unaware of any such holiday for atheists. Just when might that holiday be, your Honor?"

The judge said, "Well it comes every year on exactly the same date---April 1st!

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http://www.funlaugh.com/reindeercrash.html

. Enjoy yourselves, eat too much and have too much fun.

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Don't forget to click the header.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

DARN, DANG IT, RATS

Oh, terrific. Has anyone ever had a day where almost everything turns to poo? I'm having that now. First off, I indavertently deleted a few comments to the Banana posting while deleting some spam junk. (Sorry. If yours was one of them please resend it?) Then Schotzy got on the computer and entered a post. Now when I am on the "create post" site there's a bunch of strange looking characters here that I guess describe the picture. Looks ok in preview but weird on this page. And Blogger spell check still doesn't work. See what happens when you take time off to shop and put up the decorations and make cookies? . And now I see tools over on the right hand side of this page. They look like tools so anyone can change what's there, but I don't know how they got there. Nor how do I know how to remove them. . Please click on the header. There's a present for you.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

I'M AVAILABLE

Schotzy here. The human who thinks he's the boss here has gone to eat dinner. I've already had mine. I appeal to you all to tell him to feed me properly. I never get mice, nor birds, nor lizards, nor good things like that to eat. "Balanced diet", he calls it. He'd just better share their Christmas Lasagne with me. . Happier news now. I've got my own email address. It's Schotzy7atgmail.com. I'm sure you know how to fix that so it can be read by the computer. Something about switching a couple of letters to an "@". . Now, please don't tell the big Cat, but I was visiting a certain website today and saw they had put in a link to an oldish Aussie Christmas song. So I thought, well, if she can do it so can I. Just one caveat: I don't think it is a song you'll want young children to see nor hear. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nWMTF5fLA6o . Here's something nice you can show people who say they don't like us cats: A cat named Oreo is being credited for nipping a carbon monoxide leak in the bud. Jeanie Probst said her cat began to act strangely since she began using a heater over the past couple of weeks. "He came out here yelling," Probst said. Oreo would run in circles under the vent or jump onto the back of a chair, stare at the register and make loud noises, she said. "It was one of those scary meows," Probst said. Once the heat would went off, Oreo would act normal again. Probst said she and her boyfriend began to realize they were getting headaches and feeling tired. They called MidAmerican Energy, which discovered the furnace was pumping carbon monoxide into their Cedar Rapids apartment, and a technician came out and fixed the poisonous leak. . I heard that people who live in Texas were treated to this headline: "State Report Says Texas Has Too Many Reports" -- AP headline . As long as there's already a newspaper headline here, look what the Aussies have found out: "Australia Finds a New Power Source -- Beer" -- London Times headline . Here's something I've been trying to figure out. Maybe you can help? The Brain Buster Card Trick ! . I need help: ¿¿¿¿ sɐǝpı ʎuɐ ǝuoʎuɐ'ǝɯ d1ǝɥ uɐɔ noʎ ǝqʎɐɯ' pǝuǝddɐɥ ʇɐɥʍ ʇno ǝɹnbıɟ ʇ,uɐɔ 11ıʇs ı puɐ ʎɐpoʇ ʎ1ɹɐǝ uɐbǝq sıɥʇ'ǝɯ ɹoɟ ǝuo ʍǝu ɐ sı sıɥʇ . One more thing. Here's some blogs where the owner didn't think before registering the name: . 11.23.2005 Webmasters who didn't think when they registered their URL Here's a list of some funny URLs, where the designer didn't thinking about how people would read the name of the site: '1) Who Represents?, a database for agencies to the rich and famous:http://www.whorepresents.com 2) Experts Exchange, a knowledge base where programmers can exchangeadvice and views:http://www.expertsexchange.com 3) Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island:http://www.penisland.net 4) Need a therapist?http://www.therapistfinder.com 5) Mole Station Native Nursery, based in New South Wales:http://www.molestationnursery.com6) Gas central heating anyone?http://www.gasheating.co.uk 7) New to Milan and you need electric light? Why not sign up on-line withPower-Gen?http://www.powergenitalia.com Bye for now.

NOW, THAT'S A BANANA

A friend asked me why I considered the banana palm as being a very rude plant. What's your opinion?
The link in the header takes you to a talented Australian's site.

Monday, December 17, 2007

NEW MEXICO'S NUMBER TWO!

Here's some unwanted news. Seems State Farm says we're only Number 2 in this category:
N.M. ranked high on list of holiday robberies According to a new State Farm study, New Mexico is the second worst state in the nation when it comes to the number of home burglaries during the holidays. Jeff Feid of State Farm said thieves are looking for specific items during the holidays. "They're gonna look for items that are easy to grab and take in their arms, not attached to the house, so electronics, jewelry, furs, things that are not attached to the house, they're gonna take 'em and dash real fast," he said. Officials with State Farm recommend that residents install security systems in their homes. They said that motion activated lights are also a good way to detour criminals. But officials said having good locks with deadbolts are the key to keeping thieves from gaining entry. The study names Nevada as the state with the most holiday burglaries and North Dakota with the fewest.
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I'm not sure if that's better or worse than being 48th in average income. Oh, well, whatever.
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A recent activity of sneak thieves here resulted in a multi amputee from Iraq having his electric wheel chair stolen. I kid you not. A collection was taken up by us locals and he was supplied with vlivk thea new unit.
I don't remember, when I was a kid, of anything this heinous and disgusting happening. I think my Dad and some of his buddies might have gone out hunting for anyone who would do such a heinous thing. I know for sure the cops would have made a super effort to find the ***'* ** *******(supply your own adjectives).
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But this kind of thing is not just reserved to Albuquerque. There's a link under the header about the recent fires in San Diego County and part way down it reports on some slime bag thievery during the disaster.
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It seems to me that American morality (and perhaps that of other countries, as well,) has sunk to a low point never dreamed of by our Founding Fathers.