A BURNING QUESTION?

Have you ever sworn at a computer?

David Macmahon, of http://david-mcmahon.blogspot.com/ asked this question on his web site.

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I've started a reply more than once, denying, each time, that I would ever do such a thing to an inanimate object. And each time Wild Thing has made strangling noises in her throat. And Schotzy smiled (yes, she can smile. Or maybe that's a sneer.) in my direction. All of those posts have been deleted. So there.

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Confession is good for the soul, I'm told. I forget who told me that (probably my Mom, years and years ago.) So here's my confession:

Yes, dammit. However, in my defense, I recognized soon that cursing only helped my mental state. It didn't do a thing for, nor to, the damn computer.

Further, in my defense, I was really cursing the software, not the machine.

That being the case, I guess I have never sworn at the computer.

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Now, I will admit to having used unsavory language regarding the keyboard. It sometimes puts strange and unpronounciable words on my screen . There is no excuse for it and I often threaten to replace it with a smarter tool.

So there, David.

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Don't forget the header. It's from the UK.

BOMB SCARE, BAGGY BRITCHES AND OPUS

About 1,700 people were kept waiting when the source of a bomb scare on a Florida cruise ship turned out to be heart medication. The scare, in which dogs were used to sniff out a suspicious package, happened Saturday as passengers waited to embark from Jacksonville aboard the Celebration Carnival Cruise Ship, The Jacksonville Times-Union reported. Cruise passengers who were kept waiting for several hours were given $15 ship credit apiece for the inconvenience, the newspaper said. It had to be the tiny nitro pills that help people with heart conditions. Connecticut Town Considers Low-Pants Ban Low Baggy Pants Could Cost You Big Bucks In Fines

STRATFORD, Conn. Something that's considered fashionable could be fineable if a Stratford councilman has his way. Councilman Alvin O'Neal is proposing a ban on baggy pants that are worn too low down with a hefty fine for those caught with their pants down. O'Neal said he is responding to complaints from senior citizens around town who notice young people wearing their baggy pants as low as possible, revealing their backsides. The councilman has proposed a town ordinance that would make it unlawful for people to wear "pants which fall below the buttocks to expose their undergarments," with a penalty of $250. The council has set a hearing on the proposed law for Monday night at Town Hall. "I've had a lot of senior citizens complain that they were tired of going to the store and seeing people with their pants down below their buttocks," O'Neal said Friday. O'Neal says the target of the new law is very specific, young people who wear trousers as low as possible without them falling down completely. "We're not out to get plumbers whose pants creep down while they're working on your pipes," O'Neal said. Any proposed ordinance would have to pass muster with the town attorney. "We intend to review it before the Town Council votes on it," Town Attorney Richard Buturla said. "Actually, a similar ordinance is being looked at in Atlanta." I wonder if the plumber exclusion is for senior ladies? Berkeley Breathed has a note up on his site: "Note to Opus readers: The Opus strips for August 26 and September 2 have been withheld from publication by a large number of client newspapers across the country, including Opus' host paper The Washington Post. The strips may be viewed in a large format on their respective dates at Salon.com.." I thought it was ok. A man comes home from work and finds his wife admiring her breasts in the mirror. He asks, "What are you doing?" She replies, "I went to the doctor today, and he told me I have the breasts of a 25 year old."The husband retorts, "Well, what did he say about your 50year old ass? "She replied, "Frankly dear, your name never came up." Be sure to click on the header and tell me how it works.

WINDOWS MEMORY DIAGNOSTIC

I found a great tool on the Microsoft web site. It's the Windows Memory Diagnostic Tool. I printed the instructions and used it. WOW! My computer is back to where it was before I had all these programs on it. Be sure to follow the instructions and take your time. You can get it from Microsoft or www.majorgeeks.com. May have to change my mind about Micro$oft being strictly a money-grubber.