ARE YOU READY FOR A QUIZ?

Hi, this is Schotzy again. Catmoves is snoring in the other room so I'm filling in for him. And there'd better be a kipper or ground beef in it for me. . That's a picture of a friend waiting for the game to start. --------> . The clickable header doesn't mean much to me. It isn't in 3-D. But there's lots there. . MORNING SEX She was in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast. He walked in, she turned and said,"You've got to make love to me this very moment." His eyes lit up and he thought "This is my lucky day!" Not wanting to lose the moment, he embraced her and then gave it his all, right there on the kitchen table. Afterwards she said, "Thanks" and returned to the stove. More than a little puzzled, he asked, "What was that all about?" She explained "The egg timer is broken." . Can't beat this new bumpersticker sentiment; "I WISH HILLARY HAD MARRIED O.J." . The Maid asks for a raise. The Madam was very upset about this and asked: "Now Maria, why do you want an increase?Maria: "Well Madam, there are three reasons why I want an increase. The first is that I iron better than you." Madam: "Who said you iron better than me?" Maria: "The Master said so." Madam: "Oh." Maria: "The second reason is that I am a better cook than you." Madam: "Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than I?" Maria: "The Master did." Madam: "Oh." Maria: "My third reason is that I am a better lover than you." Madam (very upset now): "Did the Master say so as well?" Maria: "No Madam, the gardener did." SHE GOT THE PAY RAISE . A little girl had just finished her first week of school."I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother."I can't read, I can't write -and they won't let me talk!" . "The hardest arithmetic to master is that which enables us to count our blessings." - Eric Hoffer, American Author . THE CAT COMMANDMENTS

I am the Lord of thy house.

1. Thou shall have no other pets before me.
2. Thou shalt not ever ignore me.
3. I shall ignore thee whenever I feel like it.
4. Thou shalt be grateful that I even give thou the time of day.
5. Remember my food dish and keep it full.
6. Thou shalt spend most of thy money on toys and gifts for me.
7. Thou shalt always have thy lap ready for me to curl up in.
8. Thou shalt shower me with love and attention upon my demand.
9. Above all, thou shalt do anything and everything it takes to keep me happy.