OBSERVATIONS AND STUFF

There's a special link in the header.

And there should be after putting this picture here. What do the people in the truck do if they have to go the bathroom in a hurry?

If they jump, they're likely to break a leg. Climbing down one of those tires looks like an athletic feat that should be reserved for gymnasts. Do you suppose they frantically scream at the station attendant to fetch a ladder? Maybe they have a rope ladder in the cab? Maybe they have parachutes?

This was sent to me by an Australian correspondent (no, it wasn't David) and he refuses to answer any questions.

I'd be afraid my nose would bleed from the altitude of the cab.

I might (note: might) offer a prize for the best answer. Yeah, first prize is one week in Espanola, second prize is two weeks in Espanola.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

I've come up with a sort of slogan for the environmentalists (sent it to Terry Tamminen already):

It is not a question of whether you can afford to drive a gas guzzler. It is a question of whether the human race can afford you driving it.

It's free for quoting. Big deal.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

MILAN, Italy — Can't get to Milan to see Leonardo Da Vinci's masterpiece "The Last Supper?"

As of Saturday, all you need is an Internet connection.

Officials put online an image of the "Last Supper" at 16 billion pixels — 1,600 times stronger than the images taken with the typical 10 million pixel digital camera. The high resolution will allow experts to examine details of the 15th century wall painting that they otherwise could not — including traces of drawings Leonardo put down before painting. • Click here to see 'The Last Supper' in high definition.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Don't fool with Aussies

SYDNEY (AFP) - A tourist who was attacked by a crocodile while swimming in an Australian river was so drunk that he fell asleep at his campsite before going to hospital for treatment, a report said Friday. Matt Martin was camping in an area of the northeastern state of Queensland known to be inhabited by crocodiles when he drank what he later described as "half a slab" -- or 12 cans of beer. When he dived into the river at Cow Bay in the topical far north of the state, he landed on a crocodile. After a brief wrestling match with the reptile, Martin emerged with gashes on his face requiring 40 stitches, The Australian newspaper reported. Admitting his face was "pretty messed up" when he went back to his campsite, Martin, 35, from Newcastle city north of Sydney, then slept for seven hours before seeking medical help. His injuries were so bad that when he finally did make it to hospital, he was holding a blanket to his face to stop the bleeding, the newspaper said. Crocodiles inhabit most of the waterways in northern Australia and although attacks on humans are rare, they are potentially very dangerous and numbers have increased in recent years due to official protection after fears they might be wiped out by hunters.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

When is it bad luck to see a black cat?

=^,,^= When you're a mouse.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

A man comes home from work and finds his wife admiring her breasts in the mirror.

He asks, "What are you doing?"

She replies, "I went to the doctor today, and he told me I have the breasts of a 25 year old."

The husband retorts, "Well, what did he say about your 50 year old ass?"

She replied, "Frankly dear, your name never came up."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

A linguistics professor was lecturing to his class one day.

"In English," he said, "a double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative."

A voice from the back of the room said, "Yeah, right."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Ever wonder what happens when you leave your computer on overnight?

Does it just sit idle until the screen saver kicks in?

That's what you want to believe. But now MASO Digital Studio has captured proof of the secret life of your desktop icons in a Flash clip. View the animation

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Florida Poll

The latest telephone poll, taken by the Florida Governor's office, asked people who live in Florida whether they think illegal immigration is a serious problem:

29% of respondents answered: ''Yes, it is a serious problem."

71% of respondents answered: "No, es una problema seriosa."

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Moose was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary.

His wife was really angry.

She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in less then 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!" The next morning Moose got up early and left for work.

When his wife woke up she looked out the window and sure enough there was a gift-wrapped box in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new heavy duty bathroom scale.

Moose has been missing since Friday.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Everything here has been brought to you by your friend Schotzy.

He had fish for dinner. I didn't get any of it except the smell.